poly...

okay... so i'm trying to blog... and not really knowing what to say.

and pardon the lack of capitalization and the occasional missing punctuation, i really couldnt be bothered at this point.

but yeah. so. life has been weird lately. here i am, basically house bound. i mean, i can go out, but i cant go out alone. and i cant go out for extended periods of time without suffering for it for days afterwards. apparently, the deal is that i have fibromyalgia, and i'm in excruciating pain 24/7. it had built up over time so much that while my brain was tuning it out (so i didnt even necessarily realize), my body wasn't, and was ceasing to function properly. i've got pain medications now, and they help, but not enough to make it so i can work yet. the only problem is that they dull my brain too, so it doesn't work as well at blocking out all the pain i used to. so while i'm in less pain over all, i feel it more. especially when the meds start to wear off. How exactly that's helping me, i'm not sure... Other than that i dont sleep as much now (i was sleeping 12-14 hours a day for a while).

right. so here i am, pretty much crippled, and suddenly i find myself with 2 boyfriends. who know about each other, and dont mind it at all. now... i'm alt lifestyle. i dont bring it up much here, cuz i dont want to make it the focus of my life. and i've got plenty of friends in poly relationships. but i never really thought i'd have a poly relationship, unless it was me, a guy, and a girl, or me and my bf and another couple. i never imagined myself having completely separate relationships with 2 men. But i am. And loving it. Its about the only thing that keeps my mind off the never ending aches and muscle spasms and sore joints. it wasn't planned, and it definitely wasn't something i was looking for right now, but there it is, and i've honestly never been happier.