Why I Don't Have Friends

Well, I have a few. A very few. I can count my friends on one hand, and still have fingers left to spare.

It seems like every time I try to be social, get involved in a group of people, make new friends, I am reminded quite harshly why I have so few.

Petty drama, backstabbing, temper tantrums, lack of respect for others ... These are tendencies that the majority of the human race has, and give into without a second thought.

Example: I hang out on the WoW forums quite a bit. Almost a year ago (maybe a whole year, I don't know), there were a handful of regulars on a particular forum, and we got to talking, being friends, etc. So we formed a little group, and one of us got free forums set up so we could talk outside the other forums. And that went great, except we were getting sick of the advertising on the forums we were using, so one of us bought a domain name, and tried to set up a site. He wasn't very skilled at it, so had trouble getting hosting, getting the templates set up, etc. So the BF offer to have the company donate server space and bandwidth for the endeavor, administrate things for him, and just generally help him out.

But as soon as we get the site set up, he starts getting belligerant. He starts getting a severe case of egotism, and starts stepping on people -- ordering them around, being mean and rude to them, making it out that he's better than everyone else.

I didn't appreciate it, and I told him that more than once, but I was willing to give him the benefit of the doubt, and stick things out -- hoping he would calm down eventually. Except he didn't.

There was a situation came up that he handled quite badly, and as a result many of our little group ended up really upset... And I wound up getting a temporary ban from the WoW forums because this guy failed to openly communicate certain pertinent information... Fine, whatever, he's a kid, he doesn't understand how to manage stuff, okay.

And then... He uses a slur regarding sexual orientation in our own forum chat. i.e. calling someone gay, as an insult. I think that was the last straw for me. I know it was the last straw for another of our group (who quit on the spot).

I fall into the category of persons who "subscribe" to an alternative lifestyle. Most of my friends do, and the majority of the BF's friends do as well. His company has been active in the LGBT community. So on top of my personal outrage, there's the company to worry about as well. If people found out that we supported a site that allowed that kind of behavior... We'd lose credibility. Maybe even business.

So I called out that person. I told them it was inappropriate. And you know what? He didn't care. He couldn't even understand what he did that was so wrong. He started bad mouthing me to other people in the group. And now the little community that we had is crumbling into tiny pieces, and I'm being held as the bad guy.

Now, he's stepped down as "leader" and handed things over to the rest of the "founding members" of the group... But I'm still being singled out as the reason he quit. I'm being blamed for "freaking out" over a "joke" and causing stupid amounts of drama. Me.

Its shit like this that reminds me why I don't have friends. Why I'm anti-social.

Its not that I'm an introvert (though, I am to a degree), its that I can't stand all the stupid people in the world, and I don't want to have to deal with their crap. I have enough drama of my own. I don't need anyone elses.